ONE WORD 2014 // MELAI
Happy Thursday everyone! Today I have a one word post from a very lovely woman in my church. It's greatly impacted me and I know that it probably took a lot of courage for Melai to share her story. Thank you for being brave Melai. xo
BELIEVE. This is the “one word” God has spoken into my heart.
Last year in July 2013, I was diagnosed with GAD (General Anxiety Disorder). It was the worst situation I had gone through. I could go on for days without sleeping. Anxiety attacks happened almost every 5 minutes; my mind was so anxious. It was heart breaking for me to look at my kids and not be able to take care of them. I couldn’t even look after myself. I was scared and thought I was going to lose my mind and die like that. My life was not normal as it was before. It was so dark, and I was helpless.
I remember calling to God in prayer asking Him to heal me, but I confess that those many times that I got on my knees to pray, I was so proud. I questioned the Lord many times because I could not understand why it happened to me. I thought of myself as a victim, deserving to be asked for forgiveness. My heart was full of anger, and the thoughts of my heart wanted revenge.
I had been stuck in the moment of questioning when one night the Lord spoke to me in a poem I was reading in the book called "The Purpose Driven Life".
It read:
"No, that trauma you faced was not easy.
And God wept that it hurt you so;
But it was allowed to shape your heart
So that into his likeness you'd grow."
I cried as I was reading that poem, but at the same time I felt so comforted knowing I was not alone. God was weeping with me, and He understood my pain and hurt. That "trauma I faced" wasn't because I was being punished as I thought, but was rather allowed because God has a good and perfect plan for me.
Though it was hard for me to completely grasp God's good plan for me in that moment, His presence, and His perfect power and love had kept my heart to keep believing His word when He told me "for I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, “plans
to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." (Jer. 29:11)
I fell down on my knees at the altar, and cried out to God, “Lord Jesus, I surrender all. Have mercy on me Lord and take over my life, for it is yours. Forgive all of my sins and help me to forgive. Have mercy O, Lord, please have mercy on me.” Every minute that I felt like I was dying, I realized that I had no control over my life, and that the very breath I had in my being comes from Him. That same night I felt God’s embrace as a father embraces his child. I was welcomed back into the arms of my heavenly Father for “I was dead and is alive again; I was lost and is found”(Luke 15:24). I was deeply comforted. Suddenly there was light, and I was hopeful.
JESUS is my LIGHT, MY HOPE, and MY COMFORT. I believe.
During those many sleepless nights when nothing seemed to work (scented candles, bath soak, comfort food etc.), God’s Word (my Bible) sustained me; even now His word sustains me.
JESUS is my DELIVERER.I believe.
This is one of my favorite verses... “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus”(Philippians 4:6-7).
JESUS IS MY PEACE. I believe.
As I started reading the Gospels, and the stories of miracles that Jesus did, I realized that one thing these people who were healed had in common is that they all had believed –by FAITH they believed that Jesus was able to heal them, and so they were.
I was stumbling in my faith, I had so much unbelief, but JESUS has been MERCIFUL and FORGIVING and PATIENT towards me. It seemed that the Lord was speaking to me directly after I read Mark 9:22-24. I saw myself through the eyes of the man whom Jesus was talking and so I prayed “I believe Lord Jesus, please help my unbelief.”
JESUS is my HELPER. I believe.
In mid-September, my doctor told me that he was very happy with my progress. He actually said that I seemed to get better on my own as it surprised him that he did not have to put me on the whole drug. But the truth is, it wasn’t me but JESUS who had healed me and made me better each passing day.
JESUS is my HEALER. I believe.
I would like to share these verses that God has spoken into my heart. I BELIEVE that JESUS has healed me (Jeremiah 33:6), He has redeemed me and summoned me by name, and I am His (Isaiah 43:1), and that God loves me and calls me His precious daughter (Isaiah 43:4).
I believe - JESUS IS MY REDEEMER, JESUS LOVES ME.
My Jesus has transformed my unbelieving heart and made it NEW. Jesus has made me new (2 Cor. 5: 17 ) . It is Christ who lives in me (Gal 2:20), and His Holy Spirit dwells in me (2 Cor 1:22).
Another thing that the Lord has been teaching me is “believing in prayer”. When circumstances cause me any doubt or unbelief, the Holy Spirit reminds me of one man’s humble statement in the Bible when he said, “I believe Lord, help my unbelief!” This became a powerful prayer for me. I believe that God answers prayers, and “This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us”(1John 5:14).
I need Jesus every single hour, for “apart from God I can do nothing”(John 15:5). He is the source of everything –all that I am, all that I have. And I am forever grateful for all that Jesus has done for me, and for my church family who have been constantly praying for me. The Lord has heard their prayers and mine.
JESUS IS GRACIOUS AND COMPASSIONATE. I believe.
Had I not become very sick I would not know who Jesus is to me –my Light, Hope, Comfort, and Peace. Jesus is my Merciful, Forgiving God, and Loving Lord God; my Helper, Deliverer, Healer, Redeemer, Compassionate and Gracious Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. JESUS CHRIST has set me free (Galatians 5:1). He is my freedom!
“Everything is possible for one who believes.”(Mark 9:24)
“Being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”(Philippians 1:6)
In Jesus Name, I pray for all who are hurting, lonely and depressed, for those who have illnesses, and are going through a difficult time. And I pray for all the Lord's people in Jesus Name, "Grace be to you and peace from God the Father, and from our Lord Jesus Christ."(Gal.1:3)
Thank you Melai for sharing your story. You have encouraged me greatly and I know many others will be encouraged through your testimony!
Check out the previous one words- Amy | Sarah | Tiffany | Danae | Nadia | Micaela | Kristy | Me | Julia | Caitlyn | Elijah | Yemisi
Have a great Thursday everyone!
xo,
s.s.♥.
THE ROAD TO ALT | BUSINESS CARDS
The road to Alt has begun!
I can't believe in two weeks time, I will be there!! So far I've received two packages in the mail from sponsors who will be there (amazing marketing!!). One of them, tiny prints, sent me personalized stationary...how cool is that?!!
Anyways, business cards are a big deal at Alt, so obviously, I had to make some. Mine arrived in the mail on Monday but I need to add a finishing touch and then I'll show them to you!
In the meantime, above are some business cards that I really dig. I'm already dreaming of gold foil for my next batch..ha.
xoxo,
s.s.♥︎.
LOCAL
Victoria is stepping up her game.
I've been finding myself saying that more and more as I keep discovering new little gems in my city. I was born and raised in this neck and woods and have lived my whole life here (aside from a year abroad in London).
If you haven't been to Victoria, I highly recommend visiting! It's not very large but it's not very small either. We don't get as much rain as Vancouver (yaaay!) but we don't have Zara or Topshop (maybe one day..) We have an enormous amount of coffee shops and are stepping up our food truck game. I have grown to love, really love this beautiful city.
So in this new series, Local, I'm going to be showing you different gems found in this city, like, my top 5 coffee shops or where to get the best fish taco or where to get the very best ice cream. It's going to be a delicious task for me, but I'm up for the challenge. :)
It's going to be a difficult task for me, eating all this delicious food and seeking out all these prime spots but I'm up for the challenge. :)
If you're from Victoria, I'd love to know what your favourite spots are! Let me know in the comments below!
xoxo,
s.s.♥︎.
MAY FAVOURITES
Well May has come and gone friends. With the completion of another distance course and my first half marathon, May marked a very full month for me. Because of the craziness, I definitely posted less than I did in earlier months. I'm still trying to find my rhythm, so thank you for dancing this crazy blog dance with me as I navigate my twists and turns! I'm sooooo looking forward to learning so much about this blogging world at Alt in three weeks and guess what? they just announced that OH JOY is going to be one of the speakers!!!!! (You'll remember her from this post!)
Oh yeah, and here are your May favourites!
2. Half Marathon Recap- So last Sunday I ran my first half marathon and I wrote a verrrrry long, over detailed post on it! But it was your second favourite after the one words so some of you must have liked it :)
3. She Loves Recap- At the beginning of May I went to one of my favourite places to be all year- SHE LOVES CONFERENCE! Read all about it!
4. Summer Goals- I made a Summer bucket list....so excited about sooo many things. Anyone up for a bonfire?
5. Real Talk Tuesday- Your fifth favourite post was all real talk. Sometimes in life ya just gotta get all real talk up in thurr. Real talk.
So May is almost just a memory friends. But that means that June will be upon us...aka SUMMER IS COMING!
Hope you enjoy this last day of May. James and I are throwing a bbq for my Dad's birthday. Can't wait to celebrate and hang with my famjam.
Happy weekend!
-s.s.♥︎.
WHAT I'VE BEEN READING // 2
It's been a while since I last posted what I've been reading. Since this last season was so crazy, I didn't have a ton of time to read BUT I managed to sneak a few books in.
As you know, I like to always be reading something. Instagram and twitter won't do it for me. Even blogs don't fill my longing for my desire to escape into words. Nope, only books will do it. Real books with real pages.
(I've been in bed for the past 24 hours with a nasty bug so please forgive me if my sentences don't make sense, ha.)
Ok so here's what I've been reading
1. Fan Girl by Rainbow Rowell- Ok, it was awhile ago since I've read this one so forgive me for not remembering much of it. But maybe because it wasn't that memorable? It's a coming of age book about a girl who enters college and starts learning to live without her twin by her side 24/7. It has some captivating moments but it definitely didn't get me hooked. 3/5 stars.
2. Where'd You Go Bernadette? by Maria Semple- I ABSOLUTELY LOVED THIS BOOK...even though the whole thing is written in correspondence. I was seriously captivated from the first page. I loved the daughter and I loved the layers of the mom. In this book the mom goes missing out of thin air and her daughter makes it her mission to find her. I found myself actually laughing out loud while reading this book (which is totally rare for me.) I couldn't put this book down and ate it right up. Do yourself a favour and read it ASAP. 5/5 stars.
3. The Good Luck of Right Now by Matthew Quick- If you liked the Silver Linings Playbook, you'll probably love this one. It's hilarious, warm hearted, a bit weird and so real. I don't know how the author made such a great story about a 39 year old man who lived with his mom his whole life, an alien obsessed man and his timid sister, a catholic priest and Richard Gere but he did. There are definitely some moments where I got quite weepy so be warned, you may need tissues! 4/5 stars.
4. Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn- I had heard a lot about this book so I was quite excited to read it. To be honest, I was slightly disappointed. It's about the very, very complicated relationship about a husband and wife. I really did not like the wife and I didn't really like the husband...ha, that's probably why I didn't love the book. It's a good thriller though, so read it if you're into that! 2.5/5 stars.
5. The Goldfinch by Donna Tartt- So I didn't completely finish this book and I hate it when people talk about something that they never finish but I actually couldn't stand reading this book a second more. I hated it. I was hooked in the beginning and empathized with the main character who tragically lost his mom. But about a quarter in, it got very dark and very confusing. Things seemed to drag out for a loooong time. I think the main reason I didn't like it was because there was no hope. I even skimmed the last chapters and read the last page and it ended with no hope. Read it if you really want to but I definitely don't recommend it. 1/5 stars.
I'm starting to craft my summer reading list! I'm going to California for two weeks in July so I'm on the hunt for good reads as I'll have a lot of time to read on that trip. I'd love to hear what your favourite books are! Leave your recommendations in the comments below.
xo,
s.s.♥︎.