Hello there. Today I'm back with another post on relationships. Yesterday's post was about NOT SETTLING! I know, I know, I told you yesterday I was going to write about fun Valentines ideas but that will come tomorrow (hopefully!) because I feel like today I should write about my #1 relationship rule.
Well it's actually my #2 relationship rule...because the #1 is the boy better LOVE JESUS.
And well my #2 relationship rule is a bit controversial. I know many people will disagree but I gotta share what God puts on my heart...ok? :)
I shared yesterday how I was that girl who often liked boys who didn't like her back. I would often find myself having conversations with my friends like this..."Well he texted me back right away. And then he said this....He so likes me." "Did you see him smile at me..ahhhh!!!" "He's been flirting all night with me!"
I would rationalize and rationalize and rationalize and ask for "signs" from God if the guy liked me....(goooossssh, I sound so crazy.)
I would convince myself that the guy liked me. And then I would muster up the courage to tell the boy I liked him and then.....you guessed it! He didn't feel the same way. Insert crying emoji.
Let's just say I DO NOT RECOMMEND THIS AT ALL. NOT AT ALL. I got hurt over and over because I didn't guard my heart. By the end of 2010 I was soo over over-analyzing guys so I made a rule...
NEVER ASSUME A GUY LIKES YOU UNTIL HE SAYS OUT LOUD (TO YOUR FACE aka NOT IN A TEXT/FB MSG,) I LIKE YOU.
If a guy likes you he should have the (excuse my language) balls to tell you he likes you. Yeah, yeah, he may be shy and you may be super intimidating but honestly, if he can't tell you he likes you, then it's probably best to assume he doesn't like you. Don't read into ANYTHING. Don't look for signs. Don't ask your friends.
If a guy likes you, he will let you know.
Ahhh, I hope this isn't sounding too harsh. I hope you know I'm sharing this because I made stupid, embarrassing mistakes and I don't want you to have to go make the same ones too. I want the best for you! And you deserve the best...starting with a guy who can tell you he likes you and wants to start a relationship with you. No dilly-dallying. If he's a huge flirt and won't tell you he likes you, may I suggest, keeping your distance aka run for the hills!!
You are worthy of someone who will pursue you, who will fight for you. When I was talking to James about this post he gave some sound advice, "If the guy won't fight for you in the beginning, there's no way he'll fight for you in your marriage." And in marriage, you want someone who will fight for you.
When I started using that rule in my relational outlook, I actually started to feel peace. I knew that the one for me would pursue me. I wouldn't assumed he liked me until he told me he liked me. And if he didn't, then that was ok, he just wasn't the one for me. Funnily though James was the next boy I liked. I applied the rule and did not assume anything! And a few months later he told me he liked me and asked me to be his girlfriend...so I guess the rule worked then? ;)